A Moment For Me or Perhaps No One

The DC outpost of Buddha Bar, which was invariably described as such and which I never set foot in, has shuttered. Attention should be paid. Perhaps. I don’t know. The management claims to have based their decision on “the constant struggle of the DC cliental not understanding our concept”.

I should probably have put a “(sic)” in there, somewhere, but perhaps we beige Washingtonians do not and in fact cannot ever understand the cool new way to spell “clientele”. Given our beigeness, their failure most certainly could have had nothing to do with the inherent unviability of incredibly expensive, nonphenomenal drinks to be had in an inconvenient neighborhood devoid of any meaningful street life.

Seriously, it’s Buddha Bar. They could have gotten anything in the city, anywhere at all. They could have bought out any establishment on Connecticut Avenue between K Street and Dupont, where people go on nice dates and lobbyists spend lots of money to impress people, and it would have been incredibly chic and swank and glamorous.

But the sort of people who go to overpriced fashion bars to be seen buying overpriced drinks are not the same people who would be in Mount Vernon Square. Those people want to be seen eating artisanal sandwiches or attending radical-chic poetry slams or, you know, buying their own groceries.

I want to believe that they basically did zero site selection review for this thing. If they did any at all (which seems like a charitable presumption to me), it probably consisted of taking the Acela down from New York and then walking straight up Massachussetts Avenue until they found an available storefront of a certain size. And what else was on that block? Lido Pizza? NPR? Did they think the GAO was going to go buck-wild for mysterious clients? Leathermen? LivingSocial maybe?

Whoever was in charge of this obviously doesn’t know anything about DC and, in my imagination, didn’t actually try to prevent this thing from failing in any meaningful way.

(Incidentally, the Gii Lounge near Howard University, which I also hated, has also somewhat predictably shuttered and was replaced by a much better kebab and curry shop. But I no longer live in that neighborhood, so it somewhat caught me by surprise at this point.)

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~ by J.D. Hammond on July 12, 2012.

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